But Everybody Talking Shit Sucks Anyways — New Poems

Gazing into the void,
 Validating the difference between light and dark,
 While simultaneously trying not to become an emotional stranger to
 my own existence.
 The cause of action is the wrath of people’s aching jealousy mindset,
 Hateful Tendencies,
 Or even unbalanced anger.
 Family sees what they want to see,
 blurred vision built on whispers and assumptions.
They call me names, paint me in colors I never chose, a stranger in the
 portrait of my own life.
 Because people show me kindness, because they give,
 I’m condemned in the court of their minds,
 my worth measured in gifts received,
 like generosity has a price tag only I should pay.
 I walk through their judgment, heavy like fog,
 but they don’t know me,
 not the battles I face, not the choices I make,
 not the reasons behind my smile.
 They label what they don’t understand,
 fearful of shadows they created themselves.
 I stand here, whole and unashamed,
 their voices loud, but my truth louder.